Thursday, January 21, 2010

Two Words: Heidi Montag. I Just Have To...

Sorry ya'all. I just have to chime in on this one.

I barely knew who Heidi Montag was until about 6 months ago, because I don't watch TV regularly. Since then I have seen her here and there on the news, and on talk shows with her husband, promoting their book and bragging about how cool it was to be "villains" in Hollywood. A few times I kinda thought maybe she was in on the joke with the rest of Hollywood, capitalizing on a character, ya know like Barney, or The Joker, or the Chihuahua in the Taco Bell commercials?

Anyway...

I don't think she's enjoying the ride. I think she is tragically delusional and a hurting soul.

And OK, why care, right? I mean, duh, there are many horrible things happening right now, people need our attention and care through donations and prayer in Haiti for example. But when I saw this I was just dumbfounded...

I watched her GMA interview, where she claimed "that beauty came from within," and that she didn't look different, just a "different, better version of myself". Huh? And, this interview is even sadder. She says she almost died for this. I would argue in many ways she already did.

Look. I still remember the day when an older boy teased my son about his ears at a birthday party, a kid my son hadn't met before, a kid my son wasn't even talking to before he was hurt by him. I remember seeing the kid walk up to Jacob, and them talking, and suddenly my son's smile dropping away as the kid laughed, pointed and made loud remarks about how big and funny looking his ears were, remarks I could hear on the other side of the room. When the kid bounced away laughing, I went over to Jacob and asked him what happened. "He said I had really big ears mom! He said I was funny looking!" He didn't engage for the rest of the party. My son was five!

Needless to say I cornered that kid like a starving mama bear, with a bad case of PMS, and had a little "talk" with him, eye to eye. I couldn't help it. If he was old enough to effectively make a little boy hate his ears, in 10 seconds, he was certainly old enough to hear what I had to say through my humongous bear fangs. And, no worries, I was diplomatic and stern all at once; I did not make fun of the boy back, but he KNEW he better not EVER do it again to my son or anyone! And although I assured Jacob that there is nothing wrong with his ears or looks, he still complains about his ears, so they must be covered by his hair, and sometimes worries that he is funny looking...this child:

Ya'all that breaks my heart.

So it makes me hurt for Heidi too. She states that people have made fun of her her whole life, and that she was an "ugly duckling" before she became "famous", though the ridicule continued through blogs and other sites. Her face became a reminder to her of the unfair words and teasing she received at the hands of heartless people, and seemingly she has responded to it in such a way to perpetuate it. The characters she and her husband now play clearly reflect the pain they have endured; I mean, what better way to deal with public hatred than to welcome it in with open arms, like you brilliantly orchestrated the whole thing yourself? I mean, her album is called Superficial for goodness sakes!

It's kinda like this, cat poop stinks, right? Oh of course it does I am SO right. Gag. And, sometimes you try to use an air-freshener to mask the smell. Eventually though, that air-freshener has an underlying scent of cat poop no matter where it is sprayed, or how much you loved the smell before; you are then forced to change that air-freshener to again mask the smell of cat poop that is always there regardless.

So sad. It wasn't that her face/body wasn't pretty enough, it was that it represented something that stunk, people in her life who treated her poorly. Yeah, we all have endured unfair scrutiny to some degree but, come on, some people are very delicate in nature, and, as we all know, the cloak of anonymity on a blog, or web site, or comment thread can allow people to be pure, unadulterated evil. We all can't be strong in the same ways. So, she changed what to her was already destroyed and in her mind rebuilt it successfully, though the backlash that comes now through Hollywood will be even worse, and already is. But she is living in The Now, and, for now, if she doesn't see that same face, she doesn't relate to the pain. When you're 23, have no guidance, and you sadly can't appreciate how your worth and beauty was created, from the place it matters most, this is what happens.

I mean, what do you all think? While I don't want to coddle my son into thinking he is amazing looking, I do want him to be proud and thankful for how he was made, and to not allow people to dictate how he views himself. I want him to be accountable to his actions and character while not being dependent on the approval of man. I wish that for Heidi.

So, if in any of our circles, her name comes up, let's say a quick prayer for her, and something nice too, shall we?


16 comments:

Kearsie said...

I am sad for her for several reasons. First, there will be something else she doesn't like about herself, what then? Another round of surgeries? Second, she spend a large fortune for her new body, money that could've gone to starving children and such. And third, big boobs aren't all they're cracked up to be. Trust me.

Ian said...

Who? Don't flame, I seriously have no idea who in the heck she is. Yes I know I can look it up...but I've only heard her name in passing.

blueviolet said...

Your son is a handsome young man! What a shame that one statement has had such lasting impact!

I think Heidi looked better before, but you're right. There are clearly issues lying underneath and maybe we shouldn't be so quick to throw stones.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

Eek. So, you don't approve of my antics after she started following me on Twitter, eh?

Your son is absolutely adorable, Kim!!

robin said...

oh man....i saw this in the store the other day and was just as sad as you are kimmy. she looked so much prettier before her "makeover". sigh.....i hope she stops soon.

Lisa Marie said...

What an adorable boy!
I do not pay much attention to Hollywood hoopla. They are not my friends or family so I guess I just don't care if so and so is getting divorced/boob job/rehab...whatever.
I do think it seems many young girls have a very different perception of beauty than I did at their age. I hate to see so many go under the knife to achieve "perfection"

My Lipstick Life said...

I think it's a shame that words can cut so deeply and universally! Your son is a precious gift of God and should not be made to doubt that - inside and out! Heidi claims to be a Christian and should know that too. Honestly, I can't understand buying boobs like that... How unfortunate. No woman wants those for herself. You buy those to please others! She does need our prayers.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

It's amazing how we feel about ourselves really skews what we see in the mirror. I, too, feel sad for Heidi.

ModernMom said...

OH I would guess she is a very sad girl....

Sarah said...

Hmmm, this wasn't the direction I thought you were taking, Kim! But you're right. It's so easy for us to think of celebrities as non-humans who aren't affected by any comments, but when you relate them to a real-life story like Jacob's experience, it brings it all back into focus. Nice PSA, Kim!!

Much More Than Mommy said...

I never, ever considered how this could all boil down to her insecurities based on something like how she was treated, things she read. I'm not saying it makes it acceptable or any less kind of crazy, because if she has enough money for that surgery, she certainly has enough for therapy, but it's definitely something else to consider.

It would be sad if she didn't have someone in her corner telling her how beautiful she actually was, and I hope that your kids hear you and take to heart when you tell them how gorgeous they are.

Lauren said...

Whenever I saw this on Yahoo! my jaw just plunked to the ground. It is amazing how far some people will go and how influenced they'll become by reaching others' approval. I feel bad for her, because it's not a good, healthy thing to try changing yourself this way. Boobs, chin, nose, hair. It's all so much, and I hope, soon, she realizes she needs to quit.

Acting Balanced Mom said...

Stopping by from SITS - never heard of her, but in a way I feel sorry for her and every other person who is belittled for looking a certain way... I'm pretty sensitive about appearances because my son has the opposite problem... he looks 'cute' and 'Normal' but he has autism and can't engage people ... so he gets the brunt of people's lack of understanding... luckily he is both young and mostly non-verbal so he isn't affected yet... but I worry about his future... sorry for rambling :) Love your blog - so glad I stopped by

Dee Crowe said...

I honestly had no idea who she was either until the other night...and even then I looked at my husband and said..wow, must be a slow new night.

She makes me want to puke..but I guess it is a free country...I just wish the media didn't pay so much attention to it. My large bootay is here to stay and thankfully my daughter is secure in herself that she doesn't give a rats (beep) about that stuff---yet.

Jennifer said...

I totes agree with you! I saw the cover of People and my heart broke! As crazy as she and her husband are, what she did to herself is so completely obvious, it hurts my heart. :-(

That jerk off kid who made fun of your son? He needs a spanking. Yeah! I said it! SPANKING! ;-)

Ian said...

Hey Kim...guess what?

Go to this post...that's what!

http://thedailydoseofreality.blogspot.com/2010/01/golden-ddor-globes.html

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