Friday, January 29, 2010

R.I.P Piney, August 2000 - January 2010

*Moment of silence*

He's dead ya'll.

Dead, as in, dead.

Many, many years ago, he started out, so small and frail, yet so full of life. He endured hardships through the years, and many painful prunings, but, he endured.

And as he grew in strength he protected those around him, always thinking more of others than himself.

Then his time came, his time to shine had finally arrived. He traveled a long and treacherous journey to end up in a tiny town called Lexington in November of 2009.

And on Black Friday, when folks were swiping their credit cards with feverish glee in retail department stores, he was carefully chosen by us from among many to become our own...


As he was deemed superior compared to the rest (and his price was right and he would fit through our sliding glass door).


So we cradled him with love and care in preparation for the long ride home (which was about two minutes strapped to the roof of our car).



Soon he was adorned with jewels, precious stones and symbols of love (namely Wal-Mart colored balls and hand-painted ornaments from Michaels). Oh! and those new LED lights (dang they're expensive, but, they conserve electricity!!).


And in the night I would sit and stare at him as he glowed brightly with majestic beauty. My first real Christmas tree. I fell in love and named him Piney.


He provided shelter for our gifts, the fragrant scent of fresh pine, and constant air filtration from dust and pollen in our living room.


Our Christmas morning was amazing. For a month he had waited patiently, not shedding a needle, or bearing alien spider monsters that would freak me out and cause me to set him on fire. At this point, I couldn't imagine life without him...

The season came to an end, and the adornments were removed, yet as the weeks went by I showered him with words of love, and gentle caresses, and bleach-infused waterings every other day. He yearned to live, I could see it in the little pine cones he bore...


But as the weeks went on, I could tell he was growing frail instead of growing roots. I felt dirty, evil, and wasteful, because I missed recycling week way back in the beginning of January...


So I honored his last wish, to represent TWO holidays before he passed on, and we adorned him with hearts, the symbol of our undying love...


And in the last days, when I would caress him, or play his favorite game, "pull my finger" with him, in which he would emit a fresh pine smell, I would only get handfulls of pine needles, and have to turn away so he wouldn't see me crying...

The time had come. But I held out, hoping he would make a comeback, hoping his drying-out needles were just due to the low humidity and the lull of January in general. And then, to my horror, I saw this while taking out the garbage...


A brother from another mother! He was trying desperately to reach out to me so I could save him! But, due to all the un-recycled boxes and gross neighbor filth and rusty protrusions that could give me tetanus I could not. It was worse than that scene in Dumbo. I could not let Piney know of my grisly find.

Alas, it was time. He had made it two months...see my phone?


Remember, I cannot manipulate my phone, or time, or my emotions...


Audrey did the honors of removing his seasonal decor...and, we said our goodbyes.


We gently laid him against the recycled glass bin, where shattered pieces of glass, like my heart, sat in the cold dark cavern of nothingness (ya know until they become another beer bottle or something).


I turned back to say goodbye one last time, and to sing a few bars of My Heart Will Go On, before my eyes welled up and I tripped on the concrete in my PJs in front of the college dude getting files out of his car...

And then...

I saw...


As he was carried out, I saw that he had left me a piece of his heart...or really a branch.




And I was filled with bitter-sweetness, which is my favorite kind of chocolate. And here he will sit, with other mementos, forever.


Rest in pieces Piney, hopefully by providing shelter in ponds for fish and supporting erosion borders.







For facts about real Christmas trees, click here.

12 comments:

w said...

i hate it when you make me cry. also. when you pulled his finger and he emitted a pine scent, was it silent? the emission?

and now. did the kids get star trek toys? like spock the varlculln? i told you not to be surprised.

those baby pine cones remind me of a story about whales.

rip, piney. i knew you not. and that's a good thing. because i would have broken out in hives.

and if i'm not the first to comment. it's because you distracted me with your whole "look at the facts about christmas tree" problem.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

aww man. Kim you did right by Piney. You gave him a beautiful eulogy and now he is pain free watching down over the InstantlySlim InsanityKim fam.

Kearsie said...

I shall send you pine tree air freshners, to carry with you as a reminder of Old Piney. God rest his bark.

Much More Than Mommy said...

I know it's difficult to believe, but soon you will stop pining for your tree. If I may opine, I think you just need(le) to remember all the good times you had.

RIP Piney.

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Piney lived a long life. He outlasted his peers by three weeks. That's 99 years in tree life.

ModernMom said...

:) You scared me for just a second!
I actually can't believe how long piney lasted...his cousin sprucy only made it until Jan 4th!

Veronica King: aka Queen Vee said...

Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!!

And RIP Piney =]

Creative Junkie said...

What a sweet ode to pine! So much better than my husband who, with our last live tree, decapitated it and then went all Jeffrey Dahmer all over it and cut it up into a zillion pieces because it was easier to dispose of than dragging its carcass across our rugs.

We have an artifical tree now. Shocker.

robin said...

rest in peace piney. your legacy will live on forever.may you find the crystal forest beyond the sea of fresh clean water in the undying lands of eternity.....WAAAAAAAA!

hawkbrwn said...

sniff.

bitter-sweet is my favorite chocolate too.

Maven said...

Piney died??? *big tears*

He got to fulfill his Christmas destiny as well as a mission to love.

Piney did a lot in his short life.

He will be missed.

Holly Ann said...

Rest in Peace Piney! I am so glad that Piney brought such love into your home, you (and we) will never forget him... he will forever be in your heart (and your carpet)!

May his next journey take him to a place as wonderful as his last (your flower garden, perhaps ~ mulch, mulch)... :-)

see i am trying to be as witty as you were in this post but i don't think its working :-)

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