Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Tuesday Twitters


We have adopted a mallard pair that now spends most of their time on our patio. The kids named them George Washington and Zelda. They are so sweet, and sleep in our shrubs and eat the bird food I have thrown out. But man, George can sure crap like an over-sized Chihuahua! Never thought I would be picking up my pet duck’s poop. Sheesh.


I think my face is sunburned.


I really need one of those extender-grabber-picker-upper-elongated-jaws-that-grab-stuff-thingies. I think that about half of my house is behind the washer and dryer, and I want it back.


I am about to take my elliptical training to the next level. I just want to know though, why I can burn 500 calories in a session and not see any change, yet eat Thanksgiving Dinner and immediately no longer fit in the pants I put on before I sat down. Why?


I scared all the parents at soccer, and probably ruined someone’s video. I didn’t mean to…


Ok yeah, my face is definitely sunburned.


I am going to have TWO great giveaways coming up VERY soon! Please enter, ok?


I have this strange need to watch Kung Pow! again soon…weeoo weeoo!


I think I might take too many quizzes on FB. So far I have learned that I am an over-dependent, red-headed Spanish-Korean, who wants to be Kim Kardashian, but instead I am a Fed-Up Princess Vampire named Putrid Shadow. I have the medical knowledge of a Consultant. I am a GENIUS, or at least as smart as a 5th grader, and I should have majored in Political Science or Business, even though my life’s theme movie is, “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”. My love language is Time and Attention, and if I don’t get it I turn into a Volcano! By the way, I am a Bible Scholar, and I am so "airy" I should live in Nebraska. My eyes tell people that I am in love, I am the color Cornflower, and my natural eye color should be Yellow. I think that means I am a Smurf (Cheap Smurf actually), even thought I am REALLY Bugs Bunny dressed as Ariel. Wait…no…I am really a Pirate, and my name is Captian Soggy Beard of the pirate ship Rusty Bottom, and during the day people refer to me as the Hobbit Dudo Twofoot. Interestingly enough, the last few quizzes I took said I was normal and extremely honest and a GRAMMER MASTER, but really I’m more of a Jedi Master, Obi Wan Kenobi to be exact. In case you find my insanity addicting, I can be rented out for Easter parties, look me up under the name Nibbles Fluffypaws. In a pinch, I can also be Batman or Jason Bourne if bunnies aren’t your style. If zombies attack during the party, know that I will be the most likely person to survive , because I am also a DRAGON and I am supposed to die at the ripe old age of 110 when I am killed by Godzilla, not by zombies.


I think I am just gonna stop right here.


6 comments:

w said...

*pokes kim's red face to watch the blanching*

i see you didn't mention the fact that you are quiz feet. must soak brain in bleach again.

eat the ducks for thanksgiving this year. they're a cullinary delight with - well, what else? mayernaise. sigh.

TheClayMuse said...

hahahah love th tuesday twitters.. and speaking of zombies..
Congrats! I'm awarding you the Zombie Chicken bloggers award, pop on over to check it out! http://theclaymuse.blogspot.com/

The Retired One said...

I SO wanted to do my point-for-point Tuesday twitter comments back to you today, like usual...but I just got back from a trip downstate and getting sicker....found out last night at the clinic that I have pneumonia! So I will behind for a few days and hopefully the antibiotics will kick in and I will be back to normal. But, oh...the codeine in the cough syrup helps SOOOOOO much to get me to stop hacking up my lungs!!!
The Retirement Chronicles

Kearsie said...

Umm, I hate to break it to you, but it's "Grammar Master". Also, how did your brain not blow up doing all those quizzes?

My twits for today:

I went to the dentist. I have a cavity. It's not bad. The hygenist lady was very impressed.

I got to see my earrings on Xray. They are just as pretty in black and white.

My sinus cavities are GINORMOUS.

I'm really glad they couldn't see my boogers.

Insanity Kim said...

w - want to blanch my feet? *black/white woman screaming, over and over again*

Clay Muse, thank you thank you thank you it is AWESOME!!!

R.O. Yikes! Please get better soon! Miss you 'round these parts!

Kearsie - Man, actually I feel better, because if I am not actually a "grammar master" for real, then maybe I am not a lot of the other things FB told me I was, and I can go back to using my time wisely to sleep, pluck my eyebrows and contemplate bread!

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

Hi Kim, I'm with you on the elliptical thing. Why does it take so long to loose half a pound, yet 10 oreos will prompt me to gain 2 pounds? It ain't fair!!

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