Monday, February 8, 2010

Insanity Monday: Toilet Paper

OK, first, my apologies for writing a post such as this (unless you like it, then I am totally not sorry) but, look at this!


That's some HUGE toilet paper!

Consumerism at its best. Or, sad necessity?

Isn't it just, HUGE? It's like toilet paper on 'roids! Steroids that is...

This roll might not be necessary for someone with roids...

They need lots of fiber first.

THEN they would need this roll. And some prayer.

Man, that is so HUGE! I saw the pack of 6 and I was all, I have to buy these! I have never seen anything like it! I wonder if it will fit in the dispenser?

I haven't tried yet. I am still staring at it.

At first I thought my toilet would be scared of a roll like this. Then I realized my toilet is not scared of me so, why should it be afraid of a big roll of toilet paper?

Because for SURE I am going to use too much...

Way too much.

The amount of toilet paper you use directly correlates to the size of the roll, not necessarily the size of your excrement...

HUGE!

Now, I am sure you all have TV and have seen these colossal rolls on commercials somewhere but, I have not so don't tell me these have been around for like, two years or ask me, "where have you been kim, using an outhouse in Siberia?" because I bet you're all busy unplugging your toilets from using your colossal TP rolls...

Think back though to how efficient and practical these rolls would have been in HS.

Yeah, I know you're all green now and wouldn't TP a house and waste good wiping paper.

I wouldn't because I am a nice person. Er something. Maybe I was never invited to TP a house. Or maybe I am scared of the dark, or like, trees. I don't know.

But you all know, bigger is better! More is the way to go! Soon, toilet paper will be as big as this:



Until then watch this (thanks to Vanessa over at Much More Than Mommy. We bond over stuff like this...):




19 comments:

w said...

i didn't watch the vardio because it looks like there's a whale in the background. and a radio.

i love huge toilet paper. i only use charmayerin. i'm not cullstipated. you know that.

this comment went to the crapper.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

One mighty redwood = extra large TP

Josh Theory said...

I couldn't figure out why you were taking pictures of toilet paper earlier--you notice I didn't even ask? Well, it makes sense now. :)

Dee Crowe said...

Oh man you just made my day with this post...hehehehe...I love toilet paper talk...well really bathroom talk but toilet paper will do.

Much More Than Mommy said...

I'm so glad you liked the video! And if it helps, I've never seen the ginormous TP either. We just buy the packs that have so many rolls in them that we have to store them in several places around the house. Always remember to check behind the sugar.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

Yes! I just bought these last week and they barely fit into the holders. When first using the roll you have to help it to spin or else you get lots of little shreds of TP in your fingernails.

So yeah. Have fun with this.

Joann Mannix said...

Having 3 daughters, big toilet paper in bulk, (that is just the grossest sounding statement), is a must.

We have a special toilet. We saw it at the Expo Home Depot stores when they were still around. It's called the Champion and in the store, the display toilet showed off its ability to flush 24 golf balls at once. Of course, my husband had to have it. I'm happy to say it has passed with flying colors my husband's constant attempts to clog it up. It could handle Biggie Rolls, no problem.

The Retired One said...

Only bloggers understand TP humor..!
Loved it!

gamommy2two said...

The first time we bought the HUGE roll (yes, I buy them because I hate changing the roll...this prevents that for a LONG time) the package actually came with a dispenser EXTENDER so it would fit properly. You can buy them separately now, of course.

Vickie said...

The big TPs would be great. I wouldn't have to changed the roll all the time.

Wow! I can't believe the trick actually worked!

Lisa Marie said...

I know America is getting fatter and all but our bums so big that it constitutes these gigantor rolls???

Maven said...

I've got to keep this post hidden from the Poolboy - he'd be in TP heaven over this one ;)

Kearsie said...

I currently have in my possession 36 rolls of super duper humongo sized toilet paper rolls.

Guess what? They don't fit on my small, mediocre toilet paper roll and so the entire time I'm sitting on the potty I'm busy trying to get a few squares to use.

Giant Toilet Paper = calorie burners.

The Mother said...

Did not see that coming. I would have bet on friction over suction. Oh, well.

At least I have an educational video to show my kid today.

robin said...

i am a huge toilet paper user. i have a huge bottom and no matter how big or small the mess i use a giant redwood everytime! jake gets sooooo mad! TMI sorry....

Renee Weatherford said...

LOL - too funny! Stopping by from SITS :)

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

i love those huge rolls - ik u have been missing out and HOW did mark get on an airplane all by himself - where is our security, people?

Anything Fits a Naked Man said...

OMG, this was hilarious! I HAVE been noticing the rolls appear to be getting bigger and bigger. Some of them won't even fit on my roll dispenser in my bathroom, for crying out loud!

Your blog makes me smile! Thanks! I'm your newest follower!

The Only Girl said...

Holy Crap! (no pun intended) I can't believe it sucked down that entire roll!

I love big rolls - you don't have to change them as frequently.

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