So lately, my sweet little first grader has been stuck to me like fake eyelashes on, well, any female celebrity you see, and our nature is similar in that the more time we spend together, the more we tease and razz and end up participating in WWF-type activities. She's dangerous. She wants to be a gladiator, and I think she could totally do it.
But anyway, my Little Shadow followed me around all week, asking questions, telling me jokes, demanding hugs, etc. etc. A few days ago I was in the kitchen cooking and during our initial banter, (which I can't remember now, I mean I can barely remember what I ate for lunch today) she gave me a sidewards glance while stating with waaaaaaaay too much confidence, "you're not the boss of me!"
Suddenly I had a flashback to Miley Cyrus, on Dancing With the Stars Tuesday night, screaming her whole, "I can't be tamed" mantra while emerging like an Emo Big Bird from her gilded cage...
"Oh I am SO absolutely 100% the boss of you little one!" I retorted. Ya know, just in case she wasn't joking...
She kind of stared, processed, and giggled a little, and I knew she was gonna take it further...
"Well," she began, "when I'm 18 you're not the boss of me?" She posed it as a question. Oh she's waaaaaay too coy...but she ain't no Emo Big Bird I'll tell you that right now!
"As long as you're in THIS house, or, whatever house we live in, I am the boss!" I sang back in my perfect parental voice, the same one I had heard from my own parents...
"Daddy is the boss!" Jacob chimed in from the living room. Since I didn't have the energy to address his statement I ignored him and moved on.
"So, Audrey, if you move out, then you can be your own boss and do what you want."
So she stood there for a moment, I can only imagine she was freaking out in her mind, thinking she only knew how to make toast and chocolate cake from a box, and she still needed help setting up the Wii...not to mention how she was gonna feed all 246 dogs she would soon adopt?
"Well, what if I get lonely?" She questioned.
"You can visit any time you'd like." I assured her. But this didn't assure her. She's still my baby girl!
"Maybe I'll still live with you!" She proclaimed in victory.
"Fine. BUT. I am the boss." I said, only to have Jacob chime in again, "DADDY is the boss!"
Daddy may be the head, but I am the neck. And the neck turns the head, so...
Then she went in a different direction.
"When I have kids you're gonna babysit them!" She laughed.
"Oh really? I'll just stick them in the closet." I teased.
"Moooooooooooom! No! You have to treat them like normal kids! Ya know, play with them."
"What if I don't want to play with them? What if I am old and tired?" I pushed.
"Well, you can make them take naps." She offered.
"Oh yeah, and I know how well kids sleep! I am sticking them in the closet."
Then she giggled and gave me a hug. Then she said the sweetest thing to me ever.
"Mom, you've been doing all that working out and now your jelly belly is gone! I don't like that! Where is my squishy mommy?"
Life is good.
Suddenly I had a flashback to Miley Cyrus, on Dancing With the Stars Tuesday night, screaming her whole, "I can't be tamed" mantra while emerging like an Emo Big Bird from her gilded cage...
"Oh I am SO absolutely 100% the boss of you little one!" I retorted. Ya know, just in case she wasn't joking...
She kind of stared, processed, and giggled a little, and I knew she was gonna take it further...
"Well," she began, "when I'm 18 you're not the boss of me?" She posed it as a question. Oh she's waaaaaay too coy...but she ain't no Emo Big Bird I'll tell you that right now!
"As long as you're in THIS house, or, whatever house we live in, I am the boss!" I sang back in my perfect parental voice, the same one I had heard from my own parents...
"Daddy is the boss!" Jacob chimed in from the living room. Since I didn't have the energy to address his statement I ignored him and moved on.
"So, Audrey, if you move out, then you can be your own boss and do what you want."
So she stood there for a moment, I can only imagine she was freaking out in her mind, thinking she only knew how to make toast and chocolate cake from a box, and she still needed help setting up the Wii...not to mention how she was gonna feed all 246 dogs she would soon adopt?
"Well, what if I get lonely?" She questioned.
"You can visit any time you'd like." I assured her. But this didn't assure her. She's still my baby girl!
"Maybe I'll still live with you!" She proclaimed in victory.
"Fine. BUT. I am the boss." I said, only to have Jacob chime in again, "DADDY is the boss!"
Daddy may be the head, but I am the neck. And the neck turns the head, so...
Then she went in a different direction.
"When I have kids you're gonna babysit them!" She laughed.
"Oh really? I'll just stick them in the closet." I teased.
"Moooooooooooom! No! You have to treat them like normal kids! Ya know, play with them."
"What if I don't want to play with them? What if I am old and tired?" I pushed.
"Well, you can make them take naps." She offered.
"Oh yeah, and I know how well kids sleep! I am sticking them in the closet."
Then she giggled and gave me a hug. Then she said the sweetest thing to me ever.
"Mom, you've been doing all that working out and now your jelly belly is gone! I don't like that! Where is my squishy mommy?"
Life is good.
9 comments:
omgosh, how cute that she misses her squishy mommy! That just made me smile.
LOL Best compliment ever! You are going to to remember this one forever.
That's the fun part about being a mum and spending time with kids as they were growing, you get to hear stuffs like this. I love chatting with young children and listen to their point of views etc. Priceless.
Sounds like your first grader is wise beyond her years like my first grader! And that was the Best. Compliment. EVER! She's a sweetie! And obviously a great source of entertainment. ;)
Aaaaw, she's such a cutie. And good for you for saying goodbye to the jelly belly. I'm still in the mental preparation phase of weight loss. I'll move onto the implementation phase shortly. Did you notice how I kept the time frames intentionally vague? I've been burned before....
That is the cutest story! so sweet...I love how you write too!
My heart just melted.
And I am really, REALLY glad that my girls were asleep before Emo Miley Bird came on.
oh man. <--- and you know what i really man.
this post was so sentimantal. and you've lost all your pudding belly?
i'm still in danial about mine.
Well hello. I came over to check you out because you're always the first commenter on Wendiwinn and I get jealous because I'm not. But hey, you're funny too :-)
I wish someone would talk about my missing squishy tummy. Instead, my toddler is still going around saying i have 2 babies in my tummy (the twins are now 10 months). Sort of hoping it's his way of denial that he has 2 brothers...and not just that I'm fat...
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